Michael's Musings

January 26, 2011

1. Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch & you'll have to pee.

2. Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.

3. Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act.

4. Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal & someone always answers.

5. Law of the Alibi - If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the very next morning you will have a flat tire.

6. Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now (works every time).

7. Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings.

8. Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know increases dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.

9. Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.

10. Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.

11.. Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet & who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies & stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk.

12. The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold.

13. Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers.

14. Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor, are directly correlated to the newness & cost of the carpet or rug.

15. Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible if you don't know what you are talking about.

16. Brown's Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly.

17. Oliver's Law of Public Speaking - A closed mouth gathers no feet.

18. Wilson's Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it.

19. Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there you'll feel better.  But if you don't make an appointment,  you'll stay sick.

You have a creative day.

Michael

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January 25, 2010

A photographer is coming over to the house today to take a color photo to accompany the interview I did last week with the Austin American-Statesman.  I'm told it will run sometime next month.

I just watched a very moving talk by Kirk Douglas that he gave a few days ago for the American Film Institute.  You can access it by clicking here, or if that doesn't work, paste the following address into your browser and it will take you there.

http://www.youtube.com/user/afi#p/u/1/r_AZNGrfgNI

Finally, this past weekend, I posted a review of the new Criterion Edition of BROADCAST NEWS on the Best Bets on DVD site, accessible via the link in the Introduction section of this page. 

Please take a look at it, and have a creative day.

Michael

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January 24, 2011

I watched THE SOCIAL NETWORK on DVD Saturday night.  I'd seen it in a theater when it was first released.

It's an excellent film, one that I will certainly watch again in the future.

But, like RAGING BULL and even CITIZEN KANE, it's a film that I admire, rather than "love".

I "love" CASABLANCA.  I "love" THE MALTESE FALCON.  I "love" THE GODFATHER.

The difference is that I "care" about the characters in the movies that I love.  I'm fascinated by the characters in THE SOCIAL NETWORK and the other films, but I don't really like them.

Despite all its great critical awards, I'll be surprised if THE SOCIAL NETWORK wins the Best Picture Oscar.  The Academy doesn't usually give that award to movies they don't "love".

What do you think?

Have a creative day.

Michael

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