Old, But Still Funny... : Michael's Musings
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Michael B. Druxman 
Screenwriter, Playwright, Novelist and Hollywood Historian. 

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What took you so long to get here?
Where have you been all my life?
I’ll tell you where I’ve been.  

I’ve been in show business!

Ever since I was a little kid and heard Pinocchio singing, “Hey, diddly-dee, an actor’s life for me,” that’s what I wanted. Well, not to be an actor. 
I got tired of that during my freshman year in college.

So, what to do, what to do. . .

After many years as a Hollywood press agent, I became a writer…movies, stage plays, books.  
Anything that was a challenge.  I love telling stories.

After all, with due respect to actors, directors and other artists, isn’t the only truly creative aspect of the performing arts the written word?     
Everything else is “interpretation”.

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Michael 


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Old, But Still Funny...

by Michael B. Druxman on 10/17/11

October 18, 2011

Somebody sent me this joke the other day.  I'd first heard it years ago from my uncle, Kenneth Pearl, but it still makes me laugh out loud.

The United Way realized that it had never received a donation from the city's most successful lawyer.  So a United Way volunteer paid the lawyer a visit in his lavish office.

The volunteer opened the meeting by saying, "Our research shows that even though your annual income is over two million dollars, you don't give a penny to charity.  Wouldn't you like to give something back to your community through the United Way?"

The lawyer thinks for a minute and says, "First, did your research also show you that my mother is dying after a long, painful illness and she has huge medical bills that are far beyond her ability to pay?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbles, "Uh . . . no, I didn't know that." 

"Secondly,"
says the lawyer, "did it show that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair and is unable to support his wife and six children?"

The stricken United Way rep begins to stammer an apology, but is cut off again.

"Thirdly, did your research also show you that my sister's husband died in dreadful car accident, leaving her penniless with a mortgage and three children, one of whom is disabled and another who has learning disabilities requiring an array of private tutors?"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, says, "I'm so sorry, I had no idea."

And the lawyer says, "So . . . if I didn't give any money to them, what makes you think I'd give any to you?"    


You have a creative day.

Michael

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